DOMINANT BODY LANGUAGE
(This is an extract from my book Body Language for Busy People).
When describing Body Language, many experts consider Dominant Body Language to be somewhat related to what is considered to be Aggressive Body Language, however, with far less emotional content. Never-the-less, Dominant Body Language is exactly as the name implies – a language form that is reliant on the Body to appear, and to all extent, be dominant in charter as well.
Some experts describe the stances that can be adopted in the many forms of Dominant Body Language as anything from harassment, to hounding and ‘bully-boy’ tactics. In essence, it is as the name implies, it is a real form of manufactured and willful domination that is purposely applied by the perpetrator.
Here are some of the ways these forms of, what is most aptly described as varying levels of ‘bully-boy’ tactics, and purposely named Dominant Body Language.
Size Signals through Body Language
The body is purposely placed in a variety of dominant stances which are in the main, generally open stances, which may also include additional forms of domination, made to appear far more aggressive when they are combined by other harrying aspects of control to make the domination to appear more acute that it would otherwise appear.
Remember, any manner of Dominant Body Language is not something that will accidentally occur, but is willfully and purposely displayed by the perpetrator. To call this person a ‘bully’ that delights in using ‘bully-boy’ tactics as a form of Dominant Body Language sums it up ‘pretty well.’
It is not unusual here where the bully uses size as a dominating factor. They believe, that if you’ve got the size, then use it to your advantage. If you don’t have the size, but are big anyway, the more dominant you appear to be to others, the bigger you look in their eyes. There is validity to that kind of thinking, and these people know it – and use it whenever they want to be that way.
Making the Body Big through Body Language
There are a number of ways that anyone can make their body appear to be bigger that what it usually is. Hands on hips tend to make the elbows go wide and in turn make the body seem larger than it really is. No matter what size the body is, this stance will make it look somewhat larger. If the body is small to average, hands on hips will make you appear larger, but the bully who usually already has a larger frame, is also fully aware that by placing his/her hands on hips, they will appear even larger.
The best stance to use with hands on hips to appear larger and more aggressive is to stand fully upright and as erect as you possibly can be, with the chin pushed up and little more than usual and the chest thrust out. By placing the legs apart, the size of the body is also made to look a little larger than they normally would be seen to be.
This increase in size is designed to be what the perpetrator wants it to be., a definite form of domination. Now you understand why the term Dominant Body Language is just that – in the hands of a bully – the dominance of others.
Making the Body High through Body Language
Height is also important as it gives an attack advantage to the dominator. This is usually achieved by standing up straight, or somehow getting the person you want to appear taller to lower than you. This is a normal practice in many offices where the boss may be of a shorter stature. In cases such as this, the boss will seat any visitors to his office on a lower seat or by standing throughout the conversation. Do I hear you say, ‘you are kidding me?’ Well it’s more common than most think.
Occupying Territory through Body Language
We’ve already covered this point earlier. So let’s head back to the shorter persons office. This boss will usually stand with hands on hips and feet apart while in conversation with a visitor who chooses to stand for a minute or so to finish a sentence after entering the office. However, they will most likely see the boss remain standing even after they take a seat. Here the boss is clearly invading and occupying territory that others may own or use, as a control and dominance tactic. Remember the name here – it’s Dominant Body Language and is primarily used whenever the ‘bully’ wants to dominate the situation at hand.
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This Article is by Peter Collins – In a sales career spanning more than 50 years, Peter Collins has focused on helping and bringing out the best in others – whether it involves training or mentoring salespeople, managers, business consulting to SME’s. Since the 1970’s Peter has built a reputation as a Nationally and Internationally Published author, and of the 130 books he has written over the past 48 years, Peter has 65 Business Books to his credit, (but he is mainly known for one book based on the Audio Tape series of the same name, Over 50 Ways of Closing the Sale). Peter also has written 23 Christian books. One of Peter’s books sold almost 2 million copies in the late 1970’s and is still selling well through second hand online marketers worldwide. In his personal life, Peter has been sought after as an encourager and motivator that has given of his time and talents freely despite his busy schedule. Subsequently, he has assisted churches, pastors, community and charity groups, as well as individuals through his teaching, training, development and on-going mentoring.
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